ISMM Chapter 13

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202.

The three of them stared at each other in silence for quite some time.

Little Chen lowered his eyes and stole a glance at our hands. There was a slight change in his expression as he leaned over and whispered in my ear, “I saw nothing. I know nothing. Yan Yan, fighting!”

He cupped his hands toward me in utter respect and, before I was able to make a sound at all, fled away in an instant.

 

203.

Why does this person always come and go like a gust of wind, appearing and disappearing out of nowhere?

I stared after him as he left, not knowing what had happened. It was only when I lowered my head that I realized I was still holding Gu Yiliang’s wrist.

My face somehow started burning. I immediately let go and quickly walked into the hotel.

Gu Yiliang seemed to be unaware of my little tricks. He followed after me and chuckled, “…Your little assistant is quite an interesting person.”

“He’s more than interesting…” I replied, feeling both helpless and amused.

Seeing how Gu Yiliang slightly lowered his eyes, I realized it was not time to taunt Little Chen. I pressed for the elevator and patted him on the back in a conciliatory manner, “Don’t worry——”

I wanted to tell him that if he was still concerned, he could always contact the company and inform them to prepare the public relation materials in advance. However, since there was no guarantee that the company wouldn’t come up with some lousy ideas just to rack up his traffic online, I stopped myself and only said, “——It’s going to be fine.”

He took out his cell phone, his voice so slow and gentle that it almost sounded like he was the one consoling me, “It’s going to be fine indeed. They want nothing but money. You’ve already made the point very clear to them — that they won’t get anything if they fall out with me completely. They won’t do that.”

 

204.

Staring at the flashing red digits on the screen in the elevator, I didn’t ask about any more details.

They. Them. As if there was anyone else.

A popular second-rate fresh meat of the day, a young stepmother demanding an exorbitant payment, and a whirling mysterious car accident —

It may sound very much like a suspense drama, when in fact you can simply guess what the real story is — just go ask Gu Yiliang’s father about it, the man who still hasn’t appeared on stage yet.

Each family has its own problems, but his family’s got one that’s particularly difficult to deal with.

I looked at Gu Yiliang as he was sending messages with his head lowered, and my heart twitched in pain. Feeling sad, moved, apologetic, and annoyed all at the same time, I was this close to telling him, “Forget about your dad, you’ve got me.”

I promise I’ll be a good dad. I’ll buy you candy every day.

 

205.

Seeing that he had finished sending the message, and that there were no other people in the hallway, I reached out with my hands and pinched and pulled his valuable face a few times, asking, “Give me a smile?”

He smiled at my words and gave my face a pull in return. “Why do you look even sadder than me? Give me a smile too?”

To be honest, I wasn’t in the mood for smiling. I barely managed to pull the corners of my lips upwards a little.

After he saw my expression, he tapped on the screen of his cell phone and showed it to me, “It’s all settled now. We’ve agreed on three hundred thousand per month. They’re not going to get another penny if they make another fuss. I’ve saved you thirty million altogether. Shouldn’t you be happy about it?”

I thought of what I blurted out just now and found it even harder to smile.

 

206.

Gu Yiliang seems to have grown an addiction to pulling my face. He even brought up his other hand and forcibly stretched my lips upwards, pulling my face into an expression that was uglier than crying, while he himself for some reason laughed so heartily.

Wait! What is he so happy about?

I saved my face from his hands and shot him a glare as I massaged my sore muscles.

He finally laughed enough and said to me, “Why are you so protective of me, my adversary?”

 

207.

I want to ask you the same question too, my adversary!

 

208.

As for the answer to that question…

Because he and I are connected flesh-and-soul in a certain spiritual world?

Because I ship him x me and am apart of the fandom, I can also be considered a fan of his?

Because I don’t want to see him get bullied?

Because I feel like he’s a kindhearted person?

Because he’s Gu Yiliang?

…Like I’d know.

 

209.

Seeing how I stared at him in silence, he let out a few muffled laughs, “By the way, you did a pretty vivid imitation of the ‘tyrannical president’ type. Why not consider picking a character like this for your next role?”

No matter how magnanimous I was, it still hurt to hear him criticizing my acting skill to my face. I complained in a whisper, “I was helping you and yet you make fun of my acting skill…”

“No way! That was clearly a compliment.” He flatly denied it. After giving my face another few pulls, he chuckled, “I thought you would believe in those materials…how can you remember that I was—”

Danger detected! I interrupted him in an attempt to divert the topic, “Ha! I have good memory.”

“I see——” He looked at my eyes, smiling, then blinked a few times, “So, don’t you think memorizing things about me is taking up too much space in your brain?”

 

210.

My brain was completely short-circuited by the strike from his massively destructive wink. I blurted, “Even worse! You’ve taken up all the space!”

 

211.

Me: “…”

Me: “NOO! I mean, I’d already forgotten about them at first. But the situation was so serious just now that I suuuuddenly remembered everything.”

Me: “NOO! I mean, I remembered a little portion of it.”

Me: “NOO! I mean, I was only able to recall a little portion of it anyway.”

Me: “NOO! I mean, I accidentally stumbled upon some of your interviews before and inadvertently flipped through a few of them randomly, and that’s why I retained some of the relevant memories.”

Me: “…”

 

212.

Nevermind. I choose to wave a white flag and surrender. I choose to give up without putting a fight. I choose to fold my arms and submit to the arrest.

Just let me be struck by thunder and turn into a piece of hard coke. Even that would be a more peaceful death than having to bathe in Gu Yiliang’s smiling gaze and dying from extreme awkwardness.

 

213.

Just as I thought I had exposed myself and was about to self-ignite out of awkwardness, I heard Gu Yiliang’s laughing voice, “Is it so shameful to be my fan?”

 

214.

HOLY GOD! How suave! How pleasing to the ears! How beautiful is this SOUND OF NATURE?!

I’ve never thanked him as much as I do now for being naturally straight.

 

215.

Like a farmer meeting the leader making an inspection visit to the countryside, in both excitement and tears, I grabbed both of his hands and shook them repeatedly, “…Then can…can I have your autograph?”


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0 thoughts on “ISMM Chapter 13

  1. Please excuse me as I cackle like a madman. Hope I wouldn’t choke on the spicy ramen I just finished.
    THANK YOU FOR THE UPDATE!!!! BWAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAH

  2. I’m so happy to see this update! This has to be the funniest c-novel I’m reading right now, and it’s always always a delight. I think I’ve pulled at least 4-5 other people into reading this book! Thank you so much for translating!

  3. Thank you for the translation! I’ve recently discovered this novel and it’s rapidly become one of my absolute favorites. Seeing an update of this is enough to make my entire day! <3

    Can "I promise I’ll be a good dad. I’ll buy you candy every day.” be interpreted in any way other than “I’ll be your sugar daddy”, really? Wei Yanzi, your self-denial is superhuman for real. Also “I ship him x me” but not that I like him like that or anything, seriously?!

    I can’t wait to read Gu Yiliang’s diary entry for this entire event. WYZ actually for real blurted out “You’ve taken up all the space [in my brain]!”!!!1! He did that!!!!1! And GYL’s going to rationalize this as ‘what an adorable and cute fan’ in his head, isn’t he?

  4. I rushed over here the moment I saw the update on NU. Holy crap this chapter killed me so much! He just digs his own grave. I love rereading the already translated chapters but worry that if I do it too much they’d lose the humor– *what is this struggle*

    Thanks for the translation!!!

  5. I feel like… YanYan is the embodiment of every fan girl. “We like you. We ship you to us. We ship you to everyone. No one bullies you!” Hahaha. I love this… so much. It’s so pure. Thank you very much for translating.

    1. Also… reading the description in NU ” a closet gong” and YanYan saying here that he is so happy Gu Yiliang is “naturally straight.” Oh, baby, how wrong you are.

  6. “I never thanked him as much as I did now for being naturally heterosexual” I feel like that was the funniest part of the whole chapter. That stepmother! Really, how annoying !!

  7. please forgive me. someone in our room got scolded by my bro while here I am cackling like a mad man (⁄ ⁄>⁄ ▽ ⁄<⁄ ⁄)

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